-SENIOR CITIZEN- OLD AGE – A BLESSING OR A DOOM- -THE MOTHER- A POINT OF VIEW.

-SENIOR CITIZEN- OLD AGE – A BLESSING OR A DOOM-

-THE MOTHER-

A POINT OF VIEW.

There is a saying--" Those who knows the mother, knows the world”.

This caption might be true. But, ironically, he who does not care for the mother at least at the old age when she really require and expects actual help and assistance from his son…..what to call him…How to define him and in which language… when the World at large celebrates ‘Parents Day’; Mother’s Day’ and of course, ‘Father’s Day’ also.

In general, it is found that they are not in a position to talk to their parents-in particular with his mother; they find no time to visit to the mother’s house, if they stay in the same city, even during holidays, festivals or other festivities, at least to say hello, or to spend a little time to have consonance their aged parents/ to the mother.

Just think and imagine the feelings of the old aged persons of and above the age group of 50-60and above years, who happens to live separately or away from their son(s) (of course the daughters...unless live with the mother being unmarried, other wise the married shall only of some help, at times and not all the times).

This may happen on various accounts like:

        By virtue of their son living on account of job in some other state or country;

        In the course of living away from them, though staying in the same city on account of their jobs, children’s education, or to be nearer to the place of working;

        May be in the course of love marriages, and choose to live separately on one or the pretext; and

        May be on one or other account which he or his wife does not want to spell out openly.

Their offerings of excuses include heavy and unbearable job work, over time, late sittings at job work, or that they are not in a position to spare time to come from their place of residence, or other wise engaged, preoccupied on some other work.

 It may be heartening to hear from others that the so called son and his family members were seen at the restaurants, hotels, or at cinema halls, market places, or at the busy malls etc.

The comments of the neighborhood, the relations, and of the friends at this old age found to be unbearable to them. The mother, or of course, the father, make out all sorts of excuses and explanations by supporting their son’s absence. But, the mental agony of the parents, their untold feelings, sleepless nights are and cannot be brought out through pen. Their swallowing of the expressions to cover up their inner feelings, the Atmaxobha  and eyes always searching for their son and to listen to him are all found be a like  their night vision in dark or the night mare.

The enormous money they possess, the relations they had, the friends, the authority, the power and the status they had, all these have found to be not coming to their rescue in replacing the sons’ presence with them.

The old age homes, other’s counseling’s, at home celebrations on the visit of relations, friends etc, will they be of any help to them from making them to feel happy or to come out of their depressions, which I found that no person can recognize, replace , establish or detect the feelings of the Mother.

Sadhana for Elation and Elevation is found to be the only solution for the mothers who are neglected and made alone to live by their sons. No smothering words can help in distracting their eyes eagerly looking at the gate side, ears wanting to hear his voice of affection and love.

But, but, but… what. ----what the sin the Mother might have committed to loose all the love and affection from the son?

What to write and how to console and convince her about the present position of her son, and his re-thinking of inbuilt imaginations and thoughts; redefining the works, words to suit to his conveniences.

In another angle, some of the revelations made to his wife, may be with a view to satisfy his wife at his cost his of life, and to make her believe that he is taking full care, love and affection towards her/his wife. Further, his not visiting his mother may also be to make her/his wife believe that he does have so much love and affection towards her and that he does not care his mother, father , other relations.

Or, still, he may be trying to make her/his wife to believe that her versions- what ever may be- as true and beyond doubt. How to change his mind set up and about misconceptions formulated, if any, toward the divine mother.

Many of the people advocate the golden means saying that self effort and fate are like the two wheels of a chariot or are like a pair of scissors.

Whenever defeat stares us in the face, we try to console ourselves by ascribing the failure to our ‘stars’, to predestination or to the result of our deeds in the past lives or the fate. 

Whatever may be their philosophical connotation, there can be no denying the fact that we ourselves must strive to elevate our lives. But, whether all these philosophical structures and stairs help the mother to side line the son and his just looks towards her?

We always adjust to the life’s spring and actions. We preach that we must bravely march forward; we must work with a sense of dedication with immense faith in our self-effort. If some one feel that these traditional and other words can sooth her, I feel, this is going to fool themselves and nothing is going to help the mother’s looks except the son’s presence with her, may be, even for some minutes, a admiring looks toward him makes her everything all right, and nothing else.

If by chance, you make the son’s to spell out and preach about the God, the Philosophy and what not, did they listen to YOU? There is a saying to the effect that up to the sixth step it is human Endeavour and the seventh is divine favour.  Has anyone in the world ever risen in life without sustained hard work backed by assiduousness and enthusiasm, always and all the time blessed by the Mother Divine? Can any person be ever successful in any field of life if they idle away their life waiting for fate or fortune? And or just listening to some one’s prophecy about his mother?  Such a mentality will convert the man into a coward and a slave to sluggishness.

People commit many mistakes due to their weakness and then put the blame on the stars, fate and luck.  It is said that a man who slipped carelessly and fell down blamed the fate and the ground for his fall. Try to read with patience, in between the lines and not with severance or in hasty, this is only to understand that Mother is always a mother and in this world nothing can or is going to replace her at any cost.

Be realistic to understand the situations, the consequences and the sequences that might have erupted from the beginning to the point of separation of lives- of the mother and the son. Just pity the mother, the son also, and for the matters encountered in her life and the dreams about and on the expectations of him she had.

Imagine the stamina and the strength she had to sustain the draw backs, the push backs in her life to bring her son to the present position. The kicks of her son on the chest received during the early age as a kid and the joy she might have felt at that age.

And now when her son grew with maturity, in mind and developed his own thought revelations and the actions with self decision making, whether it may be arranged marriage, a contract marriage, or to that point love marriage or to go for self selection and marry his life partner, but trying or avoiding and reside separately and away from the mother, what type of explanations can any one put before her, to satisfy her?.

Her reconciliations from his child hood, she, as mother, might have pondered with joy and Jubilations for the first actions of the son, receiving kicks on her chest,(-- and now, when grown up and living separately, away from her) for the second actions, the moral kick-backs she is found to be receiving heart and heart. Who can imagine her feelings and rethinking of the past which are entirely different to her expectations?

She might have become a soft target to her belief or he, the son, might have become simpleton? He was rather a hot stuff with sanguine this affair…? Is he became sandpaper or a sandwich in his life and with the life of his mother in the name and style of living separately on one or the other pretext with his family? 

 Is it due to the love and over helmed affection and sympathy towards his family? Or has he adapted/adopted his own ways and means to suit to his convenience to visit the mother and satisfy his other loved ones.

With all the above regurgitates and surmises, still I have a belief that he, the son, for the mother and to the father, of course, is a person with sanity and still did not loose love and affection toward his mother, then why and how the situations can be changed and what is the solution to resolve the matter. I have no answer, except to rely on the God, if you believe in the God and the goodness of the son.

Even if we concede that there is fate that hinders us from reaching our chosen goals, still we can overcome the fate through our diligence and also by awakening our spiritual strength.  Had there been an omnipotent fate, concepts lie fair and foul, virtues and vices, spiritual strength would have been unheard of, the relation and the affection between the son and the mother?

Human beings are not a mere sod of earth or a log of dead wood.  No one can ever prosper in life if they harbours with the feeling the feeling that they are not responsible for their actions, and eventually lean that it is the fate which made them to behave as such, and that they does the actions on other’s say, and that he was made to believe so, and that they are pushed and pulled helplessly by fate.

He who blindly follows the invisible fate is propelled by extreme ignorance which cannot but precipitates his downfall, much and more, by delineating and denouncing the mother.

I firmly believe that only he who surrenders himself to the Mother, and/as like that- at God’s feet and prays to God whole-heartedly can regard himself as a machine and God as the driving force.  Especially noteworthy is the fact that such an individual can do no wrong and can do no harm to others.  This great man will be an embodiment of selflessness always aspiring for the weal and welfare of all in the world, and the blessings of the God or nothing but equal to that of the Mother Divine.

I boldly and with pride ascribe these connotations to the mother, who might have faced and or facing the wrath and the sufferings of the life, that too without even whispering to others.

But, now, at this age, when she requires a helping hand and counseling –leave aside her husband, and other relatives/friends, still, she shall have a feeling that the same is missing from her son.

 Fortune favours the deserving…: Patience pays….But. At what stage? for the Mother? Will it be of any help to her when she can not be in a position to relish, realize, and understand the same, except staring at him and, as dump founded by the actions of his son?

The GOD - the almighty only shall help the Mother and resolve, the son and the mother relationship, if He can?